CHRISTINE'S LAIR
WEEK 5
15th July - 21st July
Week 5 - so close to the deadline we can smell it,and it's nowhere near even close to anything approaching ready. But there's a hint of progress, and we're still relentlessly optimistic...
On the deck again, finally welded up to our satisfaction. Time for the cage. We assessed the roll cage captive plates as beyond salvage, they’ve been in 2 cars and by the time they’re cleaned up they’re too small, so we make new. It’s not that tricky, plate of the right thickness, some patience, and weld some captive nuts on.
Mark the car with the cage bolted to them, and cut the holes to sink the nuts into the sills. Easy. No. We forgot to fit the door bars. So after tacking the rear plates in we suddenly remember this bit, and they don’t fit, out it all comes again. Damn. Costs us an evening of messing about.
We’ve made the plates bigger than usual, wider and taller, they reach down to the floorpan instead of just partway down the sill. We’re not all that convinced that the original system is all that great, the thick plates are fine, but you’ve got maybe 8 or 9 inches of weld attaching it to thin sills you can actually deform with your bare hands. What, apart from the cage’s shape, stops it just ripping itself out of the car?
With the cage in, we’ve made swaged panels with which to tie it to the bodyshell. We bought them last time, but we’ve made these so we get a better, bespoke fit, and we can tie it in in more places.
Going further, we extend the cage backwards to mount to the anti-roll bar mounts, and forwards to the front shocker turrets. Well, I bought a pipe bender, had to use it for something. Tied in again with swaged panels we hope this will stiffen the front turrets up and add rigidity to the car.
This is the mark 2 version. Helen got only the rear cage extensions and some strengthening, being a class D car we were uncertain how far we could go, but this is a modified car so we can do what the hell we like. The next car will get the mark 3, though some elements of the mark 3 design are added to this car in case we go further with it later.
Injury of the week – the Bear again. The same drilling machine again. This time though it bit harder and there are two fingers that nobody is going to want to suck on for a while, it was quite an impressive degloving. Not that sucking his fingers was a popular pastime before. In fact I think I just threw up a little.
Most watched in the garage – A melange of film and television, probably topped by Gladiator, though a strong Meatloaf challenge and a late charge from re-runs of The Apprentice, the only reality television that doesn’t make you want to blow your brains out.
Helper of the week – No clue. There wasn’t anyone who physically lifted a finger, so probably Dermott, for the behind-the-scenes smoothing of operations he does so well that has those parts you forgot about arriving in the nick of time.
With these pieces in, it’s time for paint. A quick grind of all the bits we over-welded, and an orgy of etch primer. Underside, underbonnet, boot, roof, cage, everything.
As the week ends then it’s a finished shell in primer. The assembly will be done at ferocious speed, but 75% of the work is in the body, and that’s done, bolting things together we can do in our sleep. Just as well, as much of it will be done in the small hours.
OK, you caught us, this picture is technically next week, but so much happened that week you need to get this one now.
War of the Worlds meets Total Recall