This is still the quick and dirty investigation phase, just working out what we have to do, so up on the scales and weighed. A little heavy, as expected. Balance is better than expected, but still easily improved with only minor tweaking, that need cost nothing to do at all. We like free improvements, they are our favourite. Weight can be lost from some areas, legally, and we like that too as a concept, taking bits off costs nowt.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Checking out the extinguisher shows the underbonnet nozzle to be merely tie-wrapped in place, sure to earn you a scrutineering fail at some tracks. The internal nozzle points at the driver’s shoes. Just what you need in a fire, cold toes. Not accidentally either, this was deliberate, the tie wraps don’t appear by themselves.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Original seat crossmember is still present on the passenger side. That’s a choice thing, but we prefer to cut them out and replace with lower but thicker items to add some more beef to the floorpan, and give you something massive to bolt that seat to.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Passenger seat is a Jaguar item, mounted high and well forward.  One of the two rear bolts was in place. The front was tie-wrapped in place, in one corner only. The other front mount had nothing at all. A 25kg seat, capable of weighing over half a ton in an impact, located with a tie wrap? Are you kidding me? The concept of this thing breaking free and flailing about the cabin, pivoting on its one good bolt to flatten the driver, probably as the cage tears free, it would have been a race to see which bit of the interior tried to impale him first.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Rear seat and ¾ panels are still fitted. The centre console is present, but loose, and lacks the armrest, which the regs say ought to be fitted.

 

The wiring is rather dodgy, but we’re not getting into that unless necessary.

 

The engine is an AJ6, which rumour suggests had at some point been well cooked. It probably needs rings.

 

Camber measured, and no two wheels are even vaguely the same, each of them has half a degree more than the last, and yet the tyre wear says more is needed. Which is the lie that the 50 profile R1Rs tell.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Up on stands then, and wheels off.

 

It gets worse.

 

All the rear subframe mounts need replacing. Radius arms bushes all require replacing. The front subframe is metalastic mounted, and the suspension only partially poly-bushed. As usual, the quick and easy job of bushing the top arms only has been done, so that the customer can be told that he has poly bushes.

 

Removal of all shock absorbers and springs confirms our bounce on the car, broken shocks. Spring rates are different to the Kutuka optimum.

 

Anti roll bars bushes are all tired. And rubber. The roll bars are standard Jaguar.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Engine mounts require renewal. Gearbox mount is a horror story, there isn’t one. The entire engine and box can be swung up and down through a 4 inch arc, it has as much location as the unfettered breasts of a fat, naked jogger.

 

Everything metalastic is just that little bit soggy and soft, it’s that cumulative effect of each piece being a bit tired that magnifies throughout until you’re sitting in an armchair instead of a race car. Well, think about it, your tired rubber bushes in your front wishbone is attached to a subframe with worn and soggy mounts, the suspension can wander all over the place. The anti roll bar in its worn mounts is attached with knackered droplink bushes, the car can lean an inch before it even tried to work. The radius arm that is totally screwed at both ends could allow the rear wheel to wander by two inches before it tries to restrain it. None of this is rocket science.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Solution in theory is complete removal, refurb and refit of both front and rear subframes. The work of mere moments.

 

In for a penny, in for a pound though, right?

 

In fact as the inspection ends we conclude that actually this car would make a decent project. Two months, take it right back to a bare shell, weld it up, do the cage properly, blast it, paint it, do all the bodywork it needs, refit the refurbed subframes, drop in an AJ16 and this could be a real flyer.

 

We don’t have two months. We have about a fortnight. Priorities first then.

 

Our inspection then suggests this is a car that could be quite easily improved by a significant margin, without spending a lot of cash. Yes, it needs shocks and bushes, but then the class D cars do go through them, the sheer weight we’re cornering gives intense wear. Rear Gaz shocks only last 18 months at best anyway.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What annoys me most about this car is that it was sold as a viable machine. Some poor sap had been racing this, and paying someone to look after it. Philip did the right thing and consulted with someone before buying it. But unless someone in the know has a look, you're stuck with the "reputation" of the vendor and hoping you get a professional job on what you buy. Having bought it at what I hear was a pretty steep price, he then has to spend another small fortune just to get it on the grid, and after a spend of many thousands of pounds it comes to me in this state?

 

In his shoes I’d be pretty aggrieved. We could have built him a car identical to “Helen” from scratch for less than this has cost to date.

 

Ah, well, facelift models cost more, and it’s in really good, shiny, pristine shape though, right? No, every panel is dented, scuffed and badly repaired, it wants a month in a paint shop.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Just because it’s “only” a class D car doesn’t mean that any old crap will do, and it’s about time we stopped looking at these cars like that. There is no reason that without spending a fortune you cannot produce a high quality machine, the corner-cutting slapdash half-arsed approach doesn’t save a lot of cash, but it does put people in danger.

 

I will bet good money that there are worse cars than this one still on track. I am sure there are points on my own car that could be picked up on, I don’t claim to be a pro, or an expert of any kind, but it is, at the very least, safe. If an amateur like me can see such glaring problems, think how bad it must really be.

 

Yes, I am somewhat outraged. It does, however, inspire me to go to greater effort. I don’t like seeing people ripped off. We can do something about this one, but we need time. I'm a gnat's cock away from lending him my beloved Helen, but news that he's named the car changes the game, you can't let a lady down.

 

Miracles every day, that’s the Kutuka way, time to fix the faults.

 

 

 

Part 3 soon - treating the disease.